The alarming reversing toaster

Category: Wendy's Wanderings 01 December 2011

Photo : David Noton

It has to be said that having Mum poorly since July has made this a very challenging year, so much so that David being the supportive husband that he is arranged a 4 day break for us in Cadgwith Cornwall nr the Lizard in November. With sun, wind, big waves, 6hr walks and no one else to be seen, it was just what the doctor ordered. Even the prospect of rising early was not that difficult as we have so little daylight at that time of the year.

Photo : Wendy Noton

So there he is as close to the cliff edge as is humanly possible without falling in - although I swear that is the way David will go. He is in the land of happiness ‘tilting and shifting’ whilst I scan the oceans for seals. And yes I did see one or rather she observed us whilst David did a sort of deckchair manoeuvre to get his tripod set up just so.


The Lizard Peninsula, Cornwall (David Noton)

It took me a while to name the yellow flower in his shot. With the great name of hottentot fig a touch festive me thinks for the New Year. However with a self catering quiet secluded cottage to get used to we had an eventful first night. You know the deal, searching for the correct light switch, read the manual to set the oven clock so we can use it, getting the ice in the freezer for the whiskey (purely medicinal of course), working out how the grill works. Is there one.......? Having walked 7 hours on a blustery day we were looking forward to a Toad in the Hole experience. It all started when I leant against the oven - it reacted by bleeping profusely at me, not being a touchey feely type of appliance! We worked out the grill (David is on sausage duty) and all is going well when the sausages start to smoke - off goes the fire alarm. Where is it? Where is the off button?

Photo : Wendy Noton

David climbs a chair and rips out the battery. I found it all rather amusing until I leant against the oven again - to which it reacted with an insulted bleep. We put on the toaster to have half a piece of toast to keep the wolf from the door, the appropriate plug is inserted, toast is in, let us hope it does not burn.

Then we start to hear a reversing lorry - but there are no roads here - this is a leafy, coastal, peaceful haven... I look at David, he looks at me, the oven still making sure we don’t ignore it by bleeping occasionally in between the reversing lorry bleeps... What on earth? The toast pops - the bleeping stops - and blow me down a toaster that warns us the toast is about to pop with... bleeping. Whose silly idea was that? I have never been in such a noisey kitchen - we are here for some peace. To top it all when we were not even near the oven with our trays piled high with ‘toad’ walking out of the kitchen the oven spoke to us again with another bleep. It could have been interpreted as ‘Enjoy your meal’ or ‘I am still here, don’t forget me!’ It is a bit creepy having appliances that won’t shut up!

Anyways it was a good excuse to recover with another whisky...

All the best to all our readers for 2012 - Keep shooting!

Photo : Wendy Noton
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David Noton Photography
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Milborne Port

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